It is a truth universally acknowledged

February 6, 2010

Ms. Fairfax: so all of that to say, should i go to this fucking dinner or what?

Me: well here is the thing about that

I think there’s three choices

you could storm on in there guns a-blazin and pointedly ask why they don’t give two tugs of a dead dog’s dick about their friend’s birthday, which, no

Ms. F: hahahahahaha

So here are some thinky thoughts I have been having about friendships between women. Read the rest of this entry »

Not everything is fraught

January 21, 2010

Seen on Facebook: the following status update.

WELCOME TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA Press 1 for English. Press 2 to disconnect until you learn to speak English. And remember only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you, JESUS CHRIST and the AMERICAN SOLIDER. One died for your soul, the other for your freedom. If you agree… copy and paste in your status.

What is the appropriate response if you DON’T agree? Booing? Hissing? Screaming “get back, honkycat” as you implement radical de-friending measures?  THESE ARE THE QUESTIONS OF OUR TIMES.

In which I think too hard about trash

January 21, 2010

So, I want to talk about a book I finished recently. (1)  Like all right-thinking people, I sometimes have a need to purge my brain of serious thinking by ingesting large amounts of trash.  Oftentimes, that trash takes the form of Jodi Picoult novels, which I find sometimes amusing despite her hilariously overworked mother-characters and her obvious, massive, throbbing boner for prosecutors. (2)  But this one gave me some pause.  Walk with me through my concerns. Read the rest of this entry »

I like your vocoder though

January 20, 2010

First blog posts start out so full of purpose!  I’m getting to know you!  You’re getting to know me!  I have so much to say!  But as soon as I open the little “add new post” window I can’t think of any of it anymore.

Now get the fuck away from me Frampton, I ain’t got shit to say to you!